Before I begin this week’s post, I want to thank Jenn for creating the kick ass new photo banner that now adorns the top of our blog.  I also want to apologize to our friends/readers/lurkers for last week’s post.  I’ve decided to chalk up my “stream of consciousness” post as a failed experiment, and will leave all of the mental streaming to Jenn from now on (apparently her brain streams with broadband, while mine is still on dial-up).

It was a warm night in mid-July, 2008.  We had been dating just over six months, and were on our second camping trip ever, which happened to be the first camping trip that was more than 5 minutes away from where we lived.  Rockport is beautiful that time of year.  Located on the Maine coast just north of busy, tourist-filled Rockland and just south of quaint, yet bustling Camden, we’re not far away from civilization, but far enough away to feel pretty secluded on the Maine coast.

The sky was very clear and the stars were out.  The moon wasn’t up, so they were all visible.  We decided to walk down the path that went from our campsite at the top of a hill in the woods to a clearing at the top of a small rocky cliff of sorts at the water’s edge.  Jenn walked to the edge, up to a wooden fence post and stared up at the sky.  I stood behind her, watching the sky as well, but also looking down at the back of her head and noticing how cute she looked as she turned her head and tilted it up and down, making sure she saw all the stars.

Our star gazing seemed to last forever.  It was wonderful, just being there surrounded by the nighttime beauty and not saying a word.  Then we decided to sit down on the old wooden bench swing that was stationed there on our little grassy cliff.

1. Despite the great efforts of both of our mothers, we do NOT separate our laundry. Whites, colors…throw them all in together!

2.. And we change our bedding maybe monthly. Unless we drop something on it while we’re having breakfast (in bed).

3. When we got engaged and ordered our wedding rings, we would wear them on the weekends and be “fake married.” One time when we were camping we even told the staff we were married. Hey, who wouldn’t want to wear TWO bands of diamonds whenever possible?

4. Sometimes we don’t shower. For days. My Mom coined this phrase as being “dirty camp people,” because this tradition originated when we rented a cabin for a week and showered minimally. You should try this, DCP style.

5. We ate the top of our wedding cake on our honeymoon! Yup. The whole damn thing. In three days. We let the fat kids EAT. On our first anniversary we ate frozen leftovers of the rest of the cake. Cake is cake.

6. The people at our local Subway knows our order. I choose to believe that they have fabulous memories, because we only eat there all the time once in awhile.

7. Sometimes we lay on the kitchen floor. I don’t really know why. It all started the night Casey proposed and I got down on the floor with him to hug him, and then we laid on the floor while we called our parents. Now we just do it randomly and talk. Our dogs totally judge us.

8. On the way back from our honeymoon we went to have our tarot cards read. She asked if I was pregnant (HA! Little did she know, apparently). But she told us we had a bright and long future together, so that’s good and I choose to believe it.

9. When we went on the cruise to Europe, we ordered a tray of chocolate chip cookies each to be delivered to our room every night. Yeah, it wasn’t really a big surprise that we both gained 10 pounds on that cruise!

10. We are currently re-living my childhood and have spent the last several nights watching Hey Dude and Jem & The Holograms on DVD. There’s no shame here. Right?

Okay, that was a little of our dark side. What are your confessions? It’s okay, you can come over to the dark side. We have cookies!

This song always reminds me of you.

You have taught me so many lessons.

When it’s important to be quiet.

When it’s important to jump up and down screaming until someone (::coughPrattcough::) listens to you. 

To take on projects in a thoughtful way.

To use painters tape, because no, my hand will not be steady enough near the ceiling and yes I will get paint on the outlet covers.

To find creative ways to survive eating only Ramen Noodles.

How to shut up when someone is venting at you and stop throwing solutions at them, when solutions aren’t what they are looking for.

That you can come apart, and come back together again.

How to support someone in a project they are taking on in their life, there’s so much I wouldn’t have accomplished without you.

How to laugh until crying.

How to take space away from the crowd and re-charge your batteries.

That being quiet does not equal being weak.

That complete opposites can be best friends. Family.

You may be small, you may be quiet, but you are “scrappy”… and you have been strong for me when I have been weak. You have had faith, when I have had none. You have thrown a bag of trash at my ex-boyfriend at his place of employment when he cheated on me.

You hold 15 years of my life, my memories, my heart.

I love you, my introvert!

Thanks for all the life lessons.

I chose the prompt lessons (or lessons) you learned about friendship from an introvert.

Dear New Gym Members,

I get it.

Having been a gym member for roughly 5 1/2 years, I have seen the spurts during New Years. After all, I don’t even need to use THE GOOGLE to tell me that weight loss is the number one resolution in the United States.

And lately, I am ashamed to admit I have been a tad bit snarky about you.

I have laughed with the gym staff about the “New Years Rush,” and I have begun counting down the days until 90% of you are gone and I can get on the elliptical again without waiting in line.

I have smirked at your shiny brand-spanking-new blinding white sneakers and new workout gear.

Tonight, I cursed all of you who made me park at a restaurant and walk over to the gym, because it is SO BUSY there was not one parking space.

But tonight, I also saw one of you in particular. She reminded me of myself, six years ago.

When I first stepped foot into the gym.

Fear.

The look of of a caged animal. Or a deer caught in headlights.

Unsure of where to go, how to work the machines.

Overwhelmed by the music, weights being dropped, the whirring of the machines. 

Not making eye contact with anyone.

Embarrassed, perhaps.

I saw her get on the treadmill. And then the bike. And then the elliptical. And then the weights.

Because they were all too hard.

That was me.

The first time I got on an elliptical I couldn’t even manage FIVE MINUTES. Tonight? I did 45 minutes. Followed by weights and the treadmill. What a difference.

So New Years folks? Honestly, I hope you stick around. I can get used to waiting for a machine. I can walk as far as I need to when there isn’t any parking. Because, I am proud of every single one of you.  Showing up is more than half the battle.

Tonight, I was reminded where I came from.

When I walked into the gym for the first time, scared. Knowing I needed to change, but not sure how. Feeling judged (but trust me, it was only me judging myself).

Tonight I was reminded that we all have to start somewhere. And it might as well be New Years. I have my own resolutions, so why should I be snarky about someone else’s?

I promise it gets easier.

Just keep coming back.

And soon enough you’ll become a regular. The atmosphere will become comforting. People will get to know you. It will become a place for you to escape and focus on you.

And then together we can scoff at the New Years rush of 2013.

Keep on Keepin’ On,
Jenn

No.

I refuse to open my eyes.

If I don’t open them, I’ll still be asleep. I shut them tighter.

I’m asleep. I’m asleep.

But I’m not.

I hear the soft snoring of my dog.

The deep breathing of my husband.

But I won’t look at the clock. Too much pressure.

I have to pee.

Sigh.

A sleepy eye peers open. Automatically glance at the clock.

Shoot.

2:59am.

Okay, fine. I will go to the bathroom, but that’s IT.

Then I will fall right back to sleep. 

Shuffle to the bathroom in the dark. Refrain from turning on the light. Hope I hit the toilet.

Shuffle back to bed. Climb in. Pull the warm covers over me. Settle back in.

Listen to the rhythmic breathing of my husband.

Briefly consider kicking him so he would be awake too.

3:33am.

IF I FALL ASLEEP RIGHT NOW I WILL GET OVER A HOUR MORE SLEEP.

But it has to be RIGHT NOW.

Sigh.

Sigh louder, hoping it will wake up husband-that-I-did-not-kick.

Dog sighs, annoyed with my disruption of his sleep. Stands up, turns in circles, settles back into a deep sleep within seconds.

Great. Now I am jealous of a 20 pound lump of fur at the bottom of my bed. 

Glance slyly at the clock. Daring it to tell me it’s time to get up, that all of this has been a dream.

3:47 am.

IF I FALL ASLEEP RIGHT NOW I WILL GET A HOUR AND TEN MINUTES OF SLEEP!

I need to remember to pack my gym clothes for after work.

The to-do lists starts unfolding in my brain like an unstoppable force.

My sleepy eyelids fight it.

No! It’s not time!

I AM SLEEPING!

Roll over and check my e-mail from my phone. Maybe this will wake up the husband-I-did-not-kick.

It doesn’t.

Wonder about my day. Will my clients show up? How cold out is it?

No! GO BACK TO SLEEP.

Glance wearily at the clock.

4:25 am.

IF I FALL ASLEEP RIGHT NOW I WILL GET A HALF HOUR OF SLEEP!

Start counting backwards in my head.

Picture a pathway that I am walking down.

The mind games I have played with myself are finally tiring my brain out.

I begin to drift back to sleep.

Just in time to wake up.

Wow, it’s been a couple of weeks since I’ve had the pleasure of doing a Stream of Consciousness post. Because I had a rough December and pulled away somewhat from the whole blogging arena. And then, I had an awakening (that you can read about here) and I am back. I know you’re excited (all 50 of you that I’m sure read this blog daily, right?…..psych!)

Anyway, I have wholeheartedly decided that 2012 is going to be the year of ME. I am cutting back at work (finally, after attempting to for the better part of 6 months), and we are making very real plans to move south. We are working out regularly, walking the dogs, and going on dates.

My resolution? Is to let go of things I cannot change. And to get back to basics. For too long I have let a depressive streak settle in on me, and I’m choosing to let it go. I know there will be days that are better than others, but a new year was just what I needed to get going.

Also, my resolution may be to push upon you the wonderful qualities of a Christmas gift my Mom got Casey and I, called the FitBit…if you have any interest in fitness you would LOVE this thing. I plan on doing a full review of it sometime in the near future, because we are obsessed slightly. In fact, it is the sole motivating factor of why I climbed 60 flights of stairs yesterday. (Yeah, my butt hurts).

My other new favorite thing? The Pandora charm bracelet Casey got me for our 4 year dating anniversary earlier this week. I love it so much! I got him a canvas print of our wedding vows which, once it arrives, I will be posting about as well.

My least favorite thing of this week? Having to paint my pretty blue bedroom over in beige. As part of operation Sell-This-House-So-We-Can-Move-to-North-Carolina every room in my house will be beige. Blech. It’s quite sad. Actually the bedroom is half-n-half right now, because the idea of fully finishing a project in one day is quite ridiculous when you consider there are movies like The Devil Inside are at the theater waiting for you to watch them. Oh yeah, and you have 60 flights of stairs to climb.

Well, that’s my 5 minutes. Hope everyone has a wonderful Sunday!! Thanks for being so patient with me. I truly have the best readers!!

This was my 5 minute Stream of Consciousness Sunday post. It’s five minutes of your time and a brain dump. Want to try it? Here are the rules…

• Set a timer and write for 5 minutes.
• Write an intro to the post if you want but don’t edit the post. No proofreading or spellchecking. This is writing in the raw.
• Publish it somewhere. Anywhere. The back door to your blog if you want. But make it accessible.
• Add the Stream of Consciousness Sunday badge to your post.
• Link up your post below.
• Visit your fellow bloggers and show some love.

OK, so I’m back after a holiday hiatus to grace the blog with my presence every Saturday again. I decided to start with this stream of consciousness post.

So this is going to be interesting.  I like the Flash. One of his villains is sitting in front of me on the desk in Heroclix form.  He is going to be donated soon, as I have found him to be worth very little money.  If anyone wants the newer Captain Boomerang, son of the classic one, then send me a line.

I really like Bon Jovi.  I’m Facebook friends with the band,.  Some would say this makes me a loser, but I think it’s cool. 

I really like the Riddler and Ghostbusters.  I posted last spring that it was my favorite movie, and in Vermont, Jenn has a friend whose husband is really into it…like he knows people that are making cool replicas of all the gadgets…it’s pretty sweet and I’m a little jealous.  I could do that too, I suppose, if I had the drive, the time, and the talent.  Instead, I’ll just play my Ghostbusters Wii game…I got to 64% in like two marathon play sessions.

Wow. My time is up!  Enjoy.  😛