Ish

The other day I caught myself thinking as someone was talking to me, “wow they are being so childish!” and I didn’t mean it in a positive way. In fact, I’m not sure I’ve ever heard that phrase used in a positive way.

But why not?

Children laugh frequently. FULL BELLY LAUGH.

Children are honest (if not a tad blunt).

Children spend hours of their day doing things that make them happy.

Children are curious about the world around them.

Children stop and literally smell the flowers.

Children point out beautiful things that we tend to walk right by.

Children ask questions that matter.

Children make friends easily, and without thinking about politics, race, or religion.

Children are spontaneous (though we often choose to regard it as “impulsive”) with their thoughts, feelings, and hugs.

Children try new things, take risks, and aren’t afraid to fall.

So I say, today – go ahead and be childish. Sounds like a whole lot more fun than being adultish.

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New Christmas Traditions

We have a lot of “traditional” traditions. We bake cookies. We make chex mix. We drink hot chocolate and watch Santa Claus: The Movie on Christmas Eve. We sing Christmas songs. We put flannel sheets on (okay, that more of a winter necessity). We decorate a beautiful tree.

But the last year we’ve started a couple of new traditions. One is that we do not buy many (if any) Christmas presents for each other within my immediate family. Instead we pick a “Christmas Angel” from http://angel.jcpenney.com/angeltree/ and go shopping for a child or two. Last year we wrote stories about who we imagine these people to be and read them on Christmas morning in lieu of opening a million presents. It’s amazing and I love this new tradition. It’s fun to shop for kids who really need it. It’s awesome knowing that somewhere on Christmas morning, children are experiencing a brighter day because of my family. I highly recommend this.
Last year (and I’m kinda letting out a BIG SECRET here, but I want to pass the idea on) we did something called “Random Acts of Kindness”… I made up cards and my Mom, Casey, and I went about spreading holiday cheer. We sent random people flowers (I literally picked people out of a phone book and sent them flowers). We paid for tolls for the people behind us (and had the toll booth people give the next person a card that said “You’ve Been Hit By a Random Act of Kindness! Pass it on!”) We paid for people’s coffee behind us. We walked up main street and filled parking meters that were about to expire. I mailed out Dunkin Donut gift cards to people I picked out of a phone book. We bought Andes mints and put them in random people’s mailboxes. This was the most awesomest adventure EVER. We all giggled nearly every day about the surprised responses we saw, the imagined responses of people just receiving these random gifts in the mail. In all, over the month of Decemeber we committed over 100 random acts of kindness. It was SO much fun. Again, I highly recommend this.
Happy Holidays, everyone! Let the spreading of joy begin! 
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Stream of Consciousness Sunday

#SOCsunday

I know you are all wondering what my pesky blog is up to this week. Well, the blog just recently got up to 34 followers! I know right?! Unfortunately, at 32 s/he started sending out job resumes so s/he could move out of my basement and stop playing World of Warcraft so frequently, but somehow the blog just hasn’t had any luck getting interviews. Maybe YOU could be the next follower to help my dear ol’ blog hit the mid-life crisis phase of life. Who doesn’t love a mid-life crisis? A few hot flashes could help the blog combat the winter cold that is settling in on Maine. So go follow, now!

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We are nearing the end of NaBloPoMo (just as I get the spelling of NaBloPoMo down, of course, it will end). I’m looking forward to having a little time away from my computer. Every healthy relationship needs some time away, and the computer and I have been REALLY CLOSE lately. I am going to be writing a “Lessons Learned” post about NaBloPoMo, so be excited because I learned A LOT this month.
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Google Analytics only feeds the obsession of learning more about my demographics, readers, and statistics regarding this blog. It’s unhealthy, but so cool. I feel like a Ninja with all this information at my fingertips!
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We are getting our Christmas tree today. And in case you’ve been following for a few weeks, I DID get my living room painted (thanks to the support of my best friend). I also got the office painted. We are kicking butt on our Sell-This-Friggin-House-So-We-Can-Move-To-NC goal. It’s hard, but will be worth it in the end. Also, now I don’t have to force the attendees of my “Ugly Christmas Sweater” Party to paint a wall in my living room before they enjoy dessert. They may still be forced to take home a piece of crapinolongerwantinmyhouse, though.
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That’s my 5 minutes. Hope you enjoyed the roller coaster ride through my brain! I’m off to get ready for brunch with some of my fabulous social worker friends! We will sit around and diagnose talk with each other like it hasn’t been months since we last saw each other. I love that feeling. Happy Sunday, everyone!
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I am linking up with Fadra for my Stream of Consciousness Sunday.
Visit her here, and join in the brain vomiting fun!
  • Set a timer and write for 5 minutes only.
  • Write an intro to the post if you want but don’t edit the post. No proofreading or spellchecking. This is writing in the raw.
  • Publish it somewhere. Anywhere. The back door to your blog if you want. But make it accessible.
  • Add the Stream of Consciousness Sunday badge to your post.
  • Link up your post below.
  • Visit your fellow bloggers and show some love.
  • Posted in Uncategorized | 14 Comments

    Clover Leaf Rolls (by Casey)

    It’s early to mid-morning, and the smell of the turkey that has been cooking for 5 hours is really starting to fill the house nicely.  My Mom is busy preparing enormous amounts of food in the kitchen, and my Dad is down puttering in the garage.  My Mom announces to my sister, my grandmother, and I that it’s time to come over to the table to make the rolls.

    We take our seats at the dinner table, still without a table cloth due to the amount of flour that is about to be dumped onto it.  My Mom pushes Grammy Gilman over in her wheelchair since she had a stroke, but she is cheerful as ever and ready to tackle the task ahead.  My Mom brings over a large stainless steel bowl, overflowing with the dough she made last night, and remarks about how much it rose.  Gram’s clover leaf rolls have been a Thanksgiving staple since before I can remember, and since she can’t make them on her own anymore, she’s decided to teach us how to assemble them with her.

    My Mom brings over the large can of Crisco, and we are each given a muffin tin.  Gram proceeds to dip her hand into the Crisco and shows us how much to rub into each of the cups in our muffin tin.  We follow suit, and soon we are ready to fill our tins with 36 clover leaf rolls.

    My Mom dumps a pile of flour in front of each of us, and after rubbing our fingers in it to avoid getting too sticky, we each rip a huge handful of dough out of the bowl.  Grammy demonstrates how big of a piece to take off of our clump of dough, and shows us how big of a ball we should roll it into.  We give it a try, filling each cup with three equally-sized (hopefully) little dough balls.  Gram’s always come out perfect.  Mine tend to be a little big and I have to focus on making them smaller.  We joke about what a giant roll will come out of some of the cups in my muffin tin.  I always love to hear Gram laugh, and I’m thankful she survived the stroke.

    We finish, and even with the flour I have quite a bit of dough stuck to my fingers.  I wash them off and my Mom takes over the clean up after removing the pans so they can rise.  She returns Gram to the living room to watch the parade, and I soon join her and we look at all the cool inflatable characters.

    When it comes time to eat, the rolls come out perfect. We joke again about how big some of them got, and how they must have come from my tin.  I take one and begin my annual count of how many rolls I ate this year.

    This was 2004.  Gram has been gone for three Thanksgivings now.  Two years ago, I attempted to make her recipe (having only formed them in the past), and while they were edible and enjoyed by Jenn, Stacey, and Sandy, they weren’t quite the same.  I tried them again this year, and taught Jenn and Stacey to be my helpers (oddly enough after having had a stroke myself), and they came out PERFECT.  Grammy Gilman’s tradition lives on, and now I will share it with the Blog World, in the hopes that it will etch itself into the Thanksgiving traditions of other families, too!  Happy Holidays everyone!

    Grammy Gilman’s Clover Leaf Rolls

    Ingredients

    2 cups lukewarm water (note: I had it pretty hot, not scalding, but hot)
    1/2 cup sugar
    1 1/2 tsp. salt
    1/4 cup shortening
    2 packages of yeast
    1 egg
    3 cups of flour
    Additional 3 1/2 to 4 cups of flour

    Sprinkle yeast over warn water and let dissolve (note: I did this in a fairly large bowl).
    Add remaining ingredients.
    Turn on to floured surface and knead till smooth and elastic (note: I gently stirred the ingredients in the bowl until it had a “batter-like” consistancy, with some lumps. I also didn’t measure the amount of flour I turned it onto, I just threw a bunch down and added as needed to get the desired consistancy.  I also turned the mixture onto the flour in small parts until I had a big dough ball.)
    You can either shape and let rise, or put the dough in the refrigerator until ready to use (in a greased bowl covered with a wet towel. It will start to rise in the refrigerator) (note: I did the latter and used Pam).
    When ready to use, spread Crisco in muffin tin.
    Roll dough into three small balls and place into each cup.
    Let rise for a hour, and bake.

    Rolls: 375 degrees F for 15-20 minutes

    Or you can make little bread loaves, as Gram sometimes did: 400 degrees F for approximately 30 minutes.

    Enjoy!

    Posted in Uncategorized | 7 Comments

    Kid Quote Friday

    Hi, everyone! Welcome back to the 2nd Edition of Kid Quote Friday 🙂 Hopefully they will make you laugh as you stand in line at Wal-Mart, feast on leftover pie, and listen to your 24 hour a day Christmas radio station!

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    Me: How are you today?
    Kid: Really busy!
    Me: With what?
    Kid: I got a stuck booger in my nose! I’ve been working on it all day!  -4 years old

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    Kid: Mom you need to do my homework for me!
    Mom: I don’t think so.
    Kid: BUT MOM. I’m FAMOUS now. FAMOUS PEOPLE DON’T DO THEIR OWN HOMEWORK! Everyone knows that. (10 y.o. after having a picture of her 4th grade class in the newspaper)
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     Me: So what are you thankful for? Friends? Family?
    Kid: Actually, I’m mostly just thankful that God made me *THIS* awesome! (10 y.o.)
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    Kid: Mama says it’s okay to ask strangers for candy today. But I still can’t ask them for money. (4 y.o.)
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    Kid: Well, he really hurt my feelings and now he’s down to 9.
    Me: 9 what?
    Kid: 9 more chances. If he hurts my heart 9 more times, I can’t be friends with him anymore.
    Me: Really? Why do they get 10 chances to hurt you?
    Kid: Well, because a cat has 9 lives – and my friends aren’t as smart as cats, so they need 10. (8 y.o.)
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    Kid: So when I say ‘huh’ it pretty much means that I’m bored of you talking.
    Me: Oh yeah?
    Kid: Yeah. I mean, it’s not that YOU’RE boring. It’s just that I pretty much know what I need to know…about life and stuff. I mean, I’m not little anymore you know. (Newly turned 8 y.o.)
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     Hope everyone has a great weekend! Stay safe, happy, and full on love! 
    
    Posted in Uncategorized | 9 Comments

    thankful

    soft light.
    dancing eyes.
    belly laughs.
    full heart.

    smells ignite memories
    that are then spoken out loud,
    remember when?

    around the table,
    thanks is given.
    for family.
    for hope.
    for everything,
    and for nothing.

    it is a day of remembering,
    of dreaming,
    of coming together.

    taking time to be present,
    to be humbled by the truth,
    that no matter how hard tomorrow is
    or yesterday was
    we would not be who we are
    without the difficult lessons

    we are thankful to simply be.

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    Linking up with MamaKat’s Writing Workshop this Thanksgiving.
    Go here to read some more amazing posts!
    Posted in Uncategorized | 7 Comments

    Gone Too Soon

    My husband, sir Casey is a huge nerd Daughtry fan. I bought him the newest CD as a surprise last night. He loves it. This morning he sent me a text saying that one of the songs was about a miscarriage. He did some research, and it was written for a friend of Daughtry’s. The lyrics kinda hit me like BOOM. So, I figured I’d post them- because he pretty much wrote my heart out in this song.

    “Gone Too Soon”

    Today could’ve been the day
    that you blow out your candles
    make a wish as you close your eyes
    Today could’ve been the day
    everybody was laughin’
    instead I just sit here and cry
    Who would you be?
    what would you look like
    when you looked at me for the very first time?
    Today could’ve been the next day of the rest of your life

    Not a day goes by that I don’t think of you
    I’m always asking why this crazy world had to lose
    such a ray of light we never knew
    gone too soon, yeah ….

    Would you have been president?
    or a painter, an author or sing like your mother?
    One thing is evident
    would’ve given all I had
    would’ve loved you like no other
    Who would you be?
    what would you look like?
    would you have my smile and her eyes?
    Today could’ve been the next day of the rest of your life

    Not a day goes by that I don’t think of you
    I’m always asking why this crazy world had to lose
    such a ray of light we never knew
    gone too soon.

    Not a day goes by that I don’t think of you
    I’m always asking why this crazy world had to lose
    such a beautiful life we never knew
    gone too soon
    you were gone too soon…

    and not a day goes by
    that I don’t think of you.

    You can go preview/download it here.

    Posted in Uncategorized | 3 Comments

    Way Back When-sday: Before & After

    The Blogivers

    Linking up with The Blogivers, today with our “before and after” pictures.

    257ish pounds – circa 2005

    337ish pounds -circa 2005

    190ish and 145ish pounds
    June 2011
    For more on our weight loss stories, you can read this post and
    to see our feature on the TODAY show with Katie Lee and Hoda you can go here.  
    And if you look back in our blog, you can find a few “features” we attempted to do for (We Used to be Fat) Friday – like the moment we knew we needed to change our fat ways or the staples we use to maintain our new healthy lifestyle. You can also read about how even at a healthy weight, I still struggle with self image.
    Thanks for reading, have a GREAT Wednesday!
    Posted in Uncategorized | 9 Comments

    Free Falling

    The other day, I took a kid that I work with to the playground.

    I promptly challenged him to a swinging contest.

    As my legs started pumping, and I gained speed and height, I begin to feel that feeling.

    The one just as you are swinging high. The wind is blowing through your hair making your cheeks red and your eyes water. And you stop for a split second before you come back down. The drop in your stomach. The lump in your throat. The pulsing of your heartbeat, felt in your brain. The silmultaneous feeling of excitement and dread.

    The feeling that you are about to plummet. The wondering if anyone will be there to catch you, if the chains on the swing will hold you. The excitement of the unknown. The free fall. 

    I remember days when I was younger. The leaps I took off of the swing from that very moment, at the highest point – pretending that I could fly. The forward rolls into space, perfecting the landing, trusting the ground to be there.

    I am far too adult to try such a thing now. Fear has replaced much of that adventurous spirit. Some would say common sense, but I believe it’s mostly fear. Because of all those times when I fell perfecting the landing, both literally from swings and figuratively from other life experiences – they have left me cautious about much of the world around me.

    But those times when I landed perfectly? The times when I closed my eyes and jumped, believing that I would be okay? The leaps of pure faith and imagination? They stand out in my mind, my heart, my soul. They are the most important times.

    They were so worth facing the fear, letting go, and free falling in the unknown. I need to do more of that.

    As for the swinging contest? I let him win.

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    Linking up this post with Heather at Extraordinary Ordinary.
    Go here and read some more great posts!
    Posted in Uncategorized | 12 Comments

    Shout Out to ICLW!

    Hey y’all! Just wanted to give a big HOWDY to my fellow ICLW 🙂 You can read about our TTC journey mostly within this post. Otherwise, just poke around and enjoy the ride! Happy to have you!

    Everyone else, pay no attention to this post 😉 It will self-destruct in

    10…9…..

    Posted in Uncategorized | 2 Comments